I was laying in bed last night while my body tried to sort out the Excedrin, Advil, Tylenol and NyQuil I had given it and I started to wonder why so many people are funnier via text and social media than they are in real life.
I figured it out. It's because I am funny. So when I read things I make them sound funny whereas the dumbass who wrote it just meant it verbatim.
This got me thinking about men who are sweet via text. They're not sweet. I'm sweet, so I make things they say sweet in my head! This means that all those sweet, funny men out there who are texting you sweet-nothings throughout the day are truly just as lame as the rest of the ass holes you've already dated.
You know who is as great as she claims to be? My dog. What you see is what you get. Just the way I like it. No games no lies no sneaking around no texting! She loves me for me and I love her the same right back. She's home when I get home and she goes to bed when I go to bed. She loves me the same way and the same amount each and every day. God bless her.
Until I find a man that is as easy to love as my dog, I see no reason to date.
Plus, she doesn't snore.
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